The Chrysler Sebring is as terrible as this island is wonderful.

There are many things I have learned from the Internets. Some of them have been more worthwhile than others.

In this instance, however, I've learned that, apparently, I am unique. Especially when it comes to this year's round of video games.


I appear to be the only person on the entire Internet who:

- Really, really enjoyed Mirror's Edge (Look for a 10-second game review in...yeah) and has very few complaints about it.

- Replayed Mirror's Edge because I liked it

- Did not feel an overwhelming need to kill all the children in Fallout 3's Lamplight Caverns. I cannot believe the number of individuals who think being called a Mungo by an invincible child was anything important at all, or even allowed it to colour their view of the game. I stand in slack-jawed amazement at how many people issue forth unending fonts of rage about this.


Stay tuned for Things The Internet Teaches Me, Volume II, in which I discuss what I've learned about cats.

I'm hungry. This hasn't helped.

This apparently is a list of 100 foods everyone should try once. The rules are to bold out ones you've tried, strike through ones you wouldn't want to eat, and leave alone ones you haven't tried. Here's the obligatory link:

The Omnivore's Hundred

Full Monty Disclosure: Italics are my own ramblings

1. Venison - Surprisingly delicious, though I prefer moose.
2. Nettle tea
3. Huevos rancheros
4. Steak tartare - Once you get over that it's raw beef, it's really quite tasty.
5. Crocodile
6. Black pudding
7. Cheese fondue - Though I wish I hadn't.
8. Carp - Get bass instead.
9. Borscht - The engine of Mother Russia, it's plain but surprisingly satisfying.
10. Baba ghanoush
11. Calamari - Depending on who cooked it and how, this can be wonderful or taste like a rubber tyre.
12. Pho - Not a fan of Vietnamese cuisine, I'm afraid.
13. PB&J sandwich
14. Aloo gobi
15. Hot dog from a street cart
16. Epoisses - Banned from French public transit? What could possibly smell that bad? I kid, I kid.
17. Black truffle - My mouth says yes, my wallet says no.
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes
19. Steamed pork buns - One of the treasures of Chinese food, these.
20. Pistachio ice cream - Unnervingly delicious!
21. Heirloom tomatoes
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Foie gras
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn, or head cheese
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper - Ow.
27. Dulce de leche
28. Oysters
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda
31. Wasabi peas - Ow.
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar
37. Clotted cream tea
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O
39. Gumbo - The Southern version of "Whatchagot Stew," recipes for gumbo are consistently delicious.
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects - I know they're good for you and all but...I. Will. Not. Eat. Bugs.
43. Phaal
44. Goat’s milk - My aunt owns a goat farm. Very drinkable!
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more
46. Fugu
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme glazed original donut - So good you can only eat one!
50. Sea urchin
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi - I am sure I have eaten these, and I'm also sure I didn't care for them, despite being half-Japanese.
53. Abalone
54. Paneer
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal - Who hasn't...
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini
58. Beer above 8% ABV
59. Poutine - It's cheese curds and gravy on top of fries. What's not to like? ...Except for everything I just mentioned...
60. Carob chips
61. S’mores
62. Sweetbreads - Just don't tell me what it is before I eat it.
63. Kaolin - You know, dust to dust and all, but...eugh.
64. Currywurst
65. Durian
66. Frogs’ legs
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake
68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain Best part of Thai restaurants.
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill - Deer killed on the highway - that's where the venison came from.
76. Baijiu
77. Hostess Fruit Pie
78. Snail
79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum - Order it Thai Spicy and kiss your sinuses goodbye.
82. Eggs Benedict
83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant I may have to make a special trip for this someday.
85. Kobe beef
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers - Dandelion salad counts, right?
89. Horse
90. Criollo chocolate
91. Spam - Go to Hawai'i, they will serve you spam and you won't know it's spam and oh god that was spam but it was good now I'm confused
92. Soft shell crab
93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor - Is this a food? Seriously? Can you put that much delicious on one plate? Won't you get arrested or something?
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee - I might kill a small squeaky creature for a bag of Jamaican Blue Mountain.
100. Snake - Snake? Snaaaaaaaaaake!

What? It's been four months?

Surely you jest.


Team Fortress 2 (360): Earlier this year I finally managed to buy myself an XBox Live Gold subscription, permitting me to walk through those golden gates into online gaming. I've never been a huge fan of online games to tell the truth; for the most part the people you meet will either spend every waking moment playing a game and therefore destroy you before you've begun to understand where the fire button is or will be such an obnoxious dickbag that you'll be put off of gaming forever. Or, at least, that was my experience with Halo. For whatever reason, the online community in TF2 appears to be slightly more refined than the vast majority of XBox Live, possibly due to the comparatively low player count as compared to Halo or TF2 on Steam. The gameplay experience is, therefore, noticibly improved - despite having only a rudimentary idea of what the maps looked like, I found myself able to have fun within the first ten minutes of joining a server.

There really isn't a lot to TF2 on console, there's six maps (which are variously capture-the-flag or territory control), nine classes and enough explosions to make the TSA uncomfortable at ninety paces. The gameplay is balanced to an almost atomic level, with excellent map design and fantastic work and attention to detail paid to the different classes, and above all it is really, really fun. The cartoonish world of TF2 makes it difficult to take seriously - it reminds you that you're playing a game, and a very silly one at that. There's really not much more to it, really - TF2 is a fine evolution of the original Team Fortress mod for Quake, and a fitting successor to Team Fortress Classic. I've spent more time on this game than I care to admit, which only helps solidify the score of A+.


On The Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness: Episode One: The overwrought title can only, of course, have come from the seething, churning mind of Penny Arcade's Tycho. After years of providing critiques and opinons on the game industry, Mike and Jerry have decided to enter it on their own accord, presumably while wearing a flameproof suit. RSPD is an interesting take on the RPG genre, combining a remarkable turn-based combat system that Square could take a few pointers from, beautiful artwork, snappy writing, the Cthulu mythos and, of course, the familiar PA "flava." While the game's episodic nature makes it short, the content that is there makes for a very fun time-waster. The price of admission is reasonable, the game is fun, and to the target audience of millions of Penny Arcade viewers, it is a smorgasboard of in-jokes and references, earing itself an A-.


Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare: I have traditionally been highly resistant to the Call of Duty franchise, feeling that the version of World War II they try to recreate was best visited in Saving Private Ryan and seeing little reason to try and improve on it. Call of Duty 4, then, is the first title in the series I have given serious time to, and Infinity Ward have done an excellent job of parting me with my free time. Like many outdoor squad-based shooters as of late, CoD4 is fairly short but it packs so much into its play time that it's easily forgiven for that. The majority of the game is tight, gripping and intense, with a gritty realism that works very well. The game's atmosphere of in-your-face sensory overload (and primary focus on the British SAS) helps to drive home the point that these are scary people doing scary things, and in a refreshing change of pace there are few if any of the Jingoistic flag-waving rah-rah hallmarks that have begun to define the war-shooter genre. The game has a battle mechanic that sits somewhere between Half-Life and Halo with a dose of (I'm told) Gears of War thrown in for good measure, and it works very well. The AI is very intelligent, battles flow smoothly and the environments are beautiful - or as beautiful as bomb-cratered Totally Not Baghdad can be. There are a wide variety of missions and the game has several moments and sequences that truly stand out as some of the best directing and writing in games, full stop. There aren't a lot of complaints I can make about CoD4, even its headache-inducing difficulty feels more like this game is hard rather than the A.I. is cheating. I'm not going to be rushing out to buy Call of Duty 5 seeing as it goes right back to World War II, but for this fantastic breath of fresh air, Infinity Ward nets themselves an A.

So I finally have a car that I think is neat enough to get a vanity plate for - hush up, I think they're fun.

Alaska allows six characters (including spaces) for plates, and I've narrowed it down to...

GLADOS
PORTAL
DALEK
TMELRD

Hmm. Decisions, decisions.

Yes, yes they are.





Developed in the early 1900s by one Leon Theremin, the man was trying to come up with a kind of non-contact proximity sensor. Incredible where musical instruments come from, isn't it?

The theremin is one of the only instruments (and I believe the only well-known one) designed to be played without touching it, as it works on principles of electromagnetic field manipulation. In essence, a theremin is two radio-frequency oscillators controlled by sense antennae - one controls volume (and is a fixed oscillator, meaning it works at one frequency) and the other controls the instrument's pitch (a variable oscillator). The principles by which theremins work is exactly the same as moving  your hand around a television or radio antenna to alter its reception -  it is literally played by waving your hands in the air. Unfortunately, you can't do it like you just don't care, or it'll suck.

Most people have heard a theremin at one point or another whether they realise it or not - the theremin was an integral part of many sci-fi shows and movies through the 1980s, and is still used whenever an otherworldly or "alien" sound is required or desired in a score. There are even several living theremin virtuosas, and a company called Moog sells a line of performance-quality pre-built theremins or theremin kits.

Off the top of my head, a couple of places theremins have been used have been in Wallace and Gromit: Curse of the Were-Rabbit and the new Doctor Who TV series, both during the opening titles. The X-Files and Star Trek both made heavy use of theremins, as did (I believe) Forbidden Planet.

Apparently the Pacific Science Centre in Seattle has a theremin in the lobby of one of the IMAX theatres that you can try to play - I'll have to hit that when I do PAX this year.

Current Mood: Booo-weee-ooooooo

Okay, okay, I'm way behind the times here but bear with me - Alaska is a kind of time machine all on its own.

My mum got me Doctor Who: The Complete First Series from 2005, with Christopher Eccleston as the Ninth Doctor.

I have to say, that was some of the best TV I've seen in a good, long time. Eccleston was an amazing actor, and just blew me away with his portrayal of the Doctor. I'm also deeply enamoured with the writing and editing - the Doctor's first confrontation with a Dalek was seriously intense. I hadn't expected them to bring such (believable!) darkness and fire to something that looks like a pepper mill.

Of all the episodes though, I have to say that The Empty Child/The Doctor Dances was probably the most outright creepy. There's something about gas masks, the child's plaintive cries for his mummy, and the masterful manipulation of atmosphere that just was terrifying on a visceral level.

It did an excellent job of balancing between self-referential acknowledgments to how much of a campy show it is ("Who looks at a screwdriver and thinks, 'Ooh, this could be a bit more Sonic?'") and delivering a very solid dramatic content that never felt rushed or incomplete. I'm one of the people that loves seeing what props were made out of (Heavy use of plumbing bits in Doctor Who, which was awesome), so that was really fun too.

So now I finally "get" Doctor Who - and boy, do I feel silly for waiting this long. I was terribly fond of the Ninth Doctor but have heard nothing but praise for David Tennant as the Tenth - so I'm eagerly waiting the arrival of the Series Two box set. Just great, great stuff.

...yes, I cried when he sent Rose home...

Current Mood: EX-TER-MI-NATE

So something I haven't mentioned here is that I've had a really bitching camera for about 8 months now, and have thoroughly enjoyed my purchase. I've found photography to be rewarding and fun, plus it's something else I can look like I know how to do.

I've gotten a number of shots that I've been really pleased with, and for the most part those show up on my Deviantart site at rsable.deviantart.com. Since it's recently come to my attention that more than one person reads this (Hi, Cyrano!), I thought I'd start linking some of the shots I really like here, too.

Spring is beginning to break through here in Southeast Alaska, and all the green things are beginning to emerge from the ground. I took a walk this last weekend and got a pair of shots I'm really happy with, which you will find after the cut.

Current Mood: accomplished

Audi Get!

Current Mood: Happy!

I am the Prophet of the Holy Spork, Bearer of the One True Tine.

"There are three tines," you say!

I say they are false tines, set here to tempt one into wickedness!

Follow the One True Tine to glory!


this has been a very boring day

So we moved out of our Very Nice First Apartment (tm) into what can be called the Ivory Bloody Tower. It's great - no loud neighbors, privacy, and we can crank the theatre as loud as we bloody want.

The downside is that our current car has no hope whatsoever of managing to escape from our new, very steep driveway - and little chance of escaping our (frequently, it seems) plowed-in street. I say to all of you 2004 Mazda 3 hatchback owners: Don't take it to Alaska.

So far our choices are boiling down to...

Door Number One: An International-Orange 2004 Ford Explorer Sport-Trac.
Why It's Awesome: Your usual SUV/truck unstoppable four-wheel-drive, every amenity you could stuff in (heated seats!), it's bright orange!
Why It Sucks: It's a Ford. I don't trust them to last much beyond five years.

Door Number Two: A red 2002 BMW 325XIT AWD sport wagon
Why It's Awesome: The BMW 3-series are some of the best cars on the road. Lots of enclosed cargo space, and goodish mileage.
Why It Sucks: Premium gas. Ow.

Door Number Huge: A black 1999 Chevrolet Silverado 2500
Why It's Awesome: It's huge. It's Chevy. It's totally unstoppable in 4x4 mode, has tons of extras (including an insulated shell topper), and is the cheapest of these.
Why It Sucks: Fifteen miles per gallon. Ow.

Door Number Awesome: Optimus Prime
Why It's Awesome: Can transform and roll out in any weather, plus can be persuaded to laser people I find annoying. Or their cars, anyway.
Why It Sucks: Runs on Energon, which is really hard to find.


Decisions, decisions.

Current Mood: beep

When will they ever end?

Mass Effect: RPGs are one of my favourite kinds of games. A well-executed role playing game will do exactly that; you assume the role of your digital avatar and are drawn into the game as much as, if not more than, a novel. Bioware's latest offering, Mass Effect, is an absolute triumph of the medium - the game tells a story of profoundly humbling scope, populated with incredible characters and excellent writing. Voice acting is (characteristic of many next-gen titles) superb, and the combat mechanic - once you get used to it - is enjoyable and pleasantly hectic. While the game is planned as a three-game franchise, this first installment actually has an ending, which is something more developers could learn from. Despite this, the game is not perfect. A commitment to keeping the game on one DVD leaves some noticeable rough edges to the game, especially on a second play-through. The game is chock-full of information, enough to spend dozens of hours reading and finding, and even at that you can feel in almost every frame of the game that the developers have more, wanted to include more, but couldn't. As a corollary, the game does not make use of the 360's hard drive for anything but saving - the resulting lack of a real caching mechanism results in the Unreal 3 engine chugging very badly in some key sequences, and the "texture pop" effect is visible in almost every environment. Despite all of this, Mass Effect is the shining jewel of Western-style RPGs and a great example of sci-fi storytelling. Warts and all, it gets an A-.

Guitar Hero III: The third Guitar Hero game is much like the other two - you have a guitar, you play the songs, you get points, and have a lot of fun. The addition of "battle modes" to the game is executed well, although it detracts from the "core" experience of the game somewhat. The music selection is much better than Guitar Hero II, including some really killer tracks (Welcome to the Jungle, Slow Ride, Black Magic Woman and La Grange), and the online capabilities are intriguing, if not completely necessary. When all is said and done, though, Guitar Hero III doesn't make you feel like you're living your rock star fantasies - it reminds you pretty often that you're just playing a game. The game is definitely worth a look, and it pulls down a solid B.

Rock Band: Okay. This is the eight-hundred-pound Silverback gorilla of music and party games. Taking the core idea of Guitar Hero and extending it to the limit, Rock Band lets you and three of your friends really rock out. Each song has tracks for vocals, drums, bass and lead guitar, making the Rock Band experience best with at least four people. The included guitar is fairly solid (despite a first-round batch of recalls), the microphone works very well and the drum pads stand up to an incredible amount of abuse. Rock Band's track list borders on phenomenal, including tracks like Enter Sandman, Dani California, Learn to Fly and Don't Fear the Reaper, with most tracks being original masters. Rock Band is more fun than it has any right to be, and when everything gets going, makes you feel like you're in a band - everyone has their part to play, and the game encourages a cooperative dynamic in ways that Guitar Hero doesn't come close to. Wil Wheaton's PAX 2007 keynote was built on the idea that gaming is a social activity - and with games like Rock Band, that idea is distilled into a physical reality. For being flat-out one of the most fun - and most accessible - games of this or any other generation, Rock Band nets another A+ with cherries on top

No, I still haven't finished Assassin's Creed or Super Mario Galaxy. At the rate I'm faffing about in Assassin's Creed (It's so fun!), it will be a while until I do that.

Current Mood: accomplished

I want Jon Stewart to smile again.

screaming and thudding

upstairs

smells like video games

harshing the mellow, man

more ham

unending

and potatoes

ham

Well, looks like going to Anchorage - where stores have heard of things like "launch day" - may have been a bad move for my wallet. Dropped by a GameStop, and damn, they had Assassin's Creed. Popped by Best Buy, and whoops, they had Rock Band.

So now I have Assassin's Creed and Rock Band.

And Mass Effect Limited Edition should be here by next Monday.

And an HD-DVD player and five - no, six - movies.

And I'm building a Guitar Hero controller into a guitar.

Guess I know how to spend my free time this winter.